I don’t know. And it’s okay!

I don’t know.

And I don’t know is a valid answer to any question when you really do not know. Not that you’re fluffing off the question, or not because you’re too busy, or your brain is too full to pay attention to the question, but because you actually have not weighed all of the available information or sourced for more, to arrive at an answer.

My husband has often commented that my dad will end a conversation with the words, “I don’t know.” And I’ve told my husband that over the years, my mom drove me nuts because during almost every conversation at some point she’d mention, “Do you know? I don’t know.” But now, mom’s gone. And of course, I’m finding there’s much that I don’t know!

But now, I think it’s okay not to know!

You see, just because I don’t know everything, doesn’t mean that I don’t live IN joy! I choose JOY in every moment. I see synchronicities in many things and relish in the glorious luscious moments, while minimizing the painful ones. Seeking balance, there is no void in me.

Therefore, I am fine not knowing exactly what comes next. I have many ideas about what comes next, but no one knows for sure, even those who’ve died and been resuscitated! And near death, well, as many of those stories as I’ve heard, though similar, they’re not all the same. Oh, I believe those persons, and the stories they recount–mostly because the stories remain unchanged for each one, though I’ve heard their stories multiple times (and I think it would be impossible to tell a lie the same way time after time).

But mostly, I’m writing this because I don’t know if you are supposed to help me change or if I’m supposed to help you. I do know we are all in this together, and that we are ALL God’s children.

Some of the most well-meaning people lately (even family) have tried to introduce, or re-introduce me to Jesus Christ, to “save me.” And I’m fine with their loving attempts, because, well, they love me! I understand their intention. I really do! And I love them for wanting to “see me again in heaven”, or wherever wonderful saved people go after death.

I prefer to believe at this moment in my life, that we all go into a Beyond. And it’s completely inexplicably beautiful! Beyond anything we can IMAGINE!

But, if your thoughts of salvation are based on your worry about whether you’ll see me at some later time in heaven, think about the JOY we might be missing RIGHT NOW, while we’re talking and connecting on a very real, visceral level. Let’s not focus so much on seeing each other again in a hereafter that no one’s seen, and miss out on the amazing and REAL life we’re currently experiencing!

I also invite you to ponder if your worry is not based upon your own ego, fear of death or the unknown.

As you can see, I’ve given this topic just a bit of thought.

A guru once told me, “If you’re unsure of anything, or troubled by any particular thought, just sit with it for awhile.” So, on this particular topic I have sat with it for some time. And here’s what I’ve been given:

If you feel I am not saved, ask yourself the following questions:

  • Is your every thought a prayer?
  • Is your every moment alone spent in meditation listening for God’s word?
  • Is your every bath, shower, or swim–a baptism?
  • Is your every bite or drink of food taken in remembrance of your Creator?

Until you can do these things and your life bears the fruit of your pure intentions, please do not judge me or any other human BEings in your life.

If you are worried about anything, you are not living in Faith. And for sure I don’t think you’re living your faith, because Jesus said we’d all be known by our fruits (what we produce with our lives).

Moment to moment people change. Even the ones who you might feel have hurt you or someone you love dearly. Send them loving thoughts without trying to change them.

That is all.

And I promise to do the same.

But, I don’t know. Do you?

Many teachers can show you, yet your vitality and vibrant life depends on what you practice daily

If you’ve been reading my blog for any length of time, you’ve come to know that there are many teachers, and many ways of living, that can help you prevent dis-ease and assist you in living a long and vibrant life.

Let’s look at those teachers again. And the practices that go well beyond food.

We all know people who can live to be almost any age, by eating white cake everyday, which as much as that exasperates me, also proves that all the cells of your body are LISTENING to you, your beliefs, your words, and the environment you place them in.

We don’t know if people are happy, think positive and hopeful thoughts, or not, but we can see the effects of their thoughts, happy people who laugh and joke, but eat the worst diets, smoke, drink alcohol, and so on–yet seemingly live fairly well.

Then there are those who fall over with a heart attack while jogging. Maybe they were sad, angry, resentful, or suffering from an aching heart.

Sometimes, it just makes no sense. And there seems to be no rhyme or reason to why some people live long lives and others die young.

There are many different schools of thought about a variety of subjects. And who gets to be the one authority on any one topic anyway?

So, this list includes everyone in my circle who promote exercise, healthy eating habits, and mindful practices (yes, some religious / spiritual, though I realize people who claim to be atheists, can also live long and healthy lives).

Who do you follow? What are your daily practices? Do they make you FEEL good when you do them? If so, I think you’re probably on a pretty good path for yourself. I am not here to judge.

I heard it said that the best exercise is the one you’ll DO! And that has proven to be true in my experience. I love the benefits of walking, Qigong, Pilates, Yamuna, yoga, deep breathing, and singing, so I continue to practice these.

I am here, as my mother was for me (in my younger years), to give you the benefit of helpful people and things that I’ve found. But my way does not have to be your way.

If you saw what I eat on a daily basis, you’d think I’d be thin, or at the very least of a “normal” weight, but I struggle with the extra 60-80 pounds I put on during a traumatic time of my life. Oh, I lose 20-30 pounds for awhile, then I slowly put it back on. I’ve paid thousands of dollars for diet books, classes, enzyme supplements, colonics, cleansing teas, doctor sponsored diet plans, and on and on, but I have not yet (I have hope) found one that really, truly, works for me. I even use EFT, Jin Shin Jyutsu, prayer, acupuncture, acupressure, reflexology, meditation, and so on also, to release the mental struggle in order to return to my pre-age 35 weight. But alas, I continue to seek to find the way back to my whole and healthy weight. I’ve even “let go” of trying–but that just piles on more pounds it seems.

Here’s an example of one of my lunches (that I eat most weekdays, as most weekends I skip lunch in favor of a Greek egg omelet):

  • 4 Romaine lettuce leaves
  • Big slice of raw onion
  • 1/2 raw squash (or zucchini)
  • 2 or 3 slices of roasted turkey breast (optional)

Sheila Raw Salad lunch.JPG

Dressing:

  • 1 T Garlic
  • 1/2 t garlic powder
  • 1/4 t cajun or creole seasoning
  • Walnut and Olive oil
  • Dash of sea salt to taste

So, I am just a regular gal, hoping to connect you with some things, or people, who will assist you to be the person you want to be. I am a Connector. Don’t look to me to be perfect. True art only finds and honors the imperfection anyway. If life were perfect and everyone was the same, it would be boring. Embrace the drama–just a little bit, and use it to make better, consistently joyous choices. That’s about as good as it gets.

Much love, and many blessings to you in ALL ways,

sheila